In recent weeks I've been able to have some life talks and it's interesting the things you start hearing about people's pasts. The thing that appalls me the most is the stories I hear from girls about ex boyfriends and the way they were treated by them. Why does it seem like some guys are never satisfied? They will complain about what you wear (can't be slutty, but can't be dress-down but can't be this and has to be that...), how you act, going out with friends, and of course, what you guys do together sexually. I never want to be that person, that practically ruins a person.
I think that a lot of guys don't realize just how much things can hurt. Over time, if you keep breaking a person down over and over, cutting them to the core, their confidence can really suffer. Girls can become quite self-conscious and really lose confidence in themselves... leading to potential poor choices. Hearing that a girl has lost so much confidence in themselves that they resort to physical "activities" to get a boy's attention saddens me so much. Every girl out there deserves the utmost respect and of course deserves to be happy. So why is it the "gentlemen" seem to constantly treat people like shit.
Well, first, they get away with it. Ladies, you should not be afraid to say no and cast a guy away. There will always be other guys out there; and if you're constantly being hurt, not finding another boy should be the least of your concerns, in my opinion.
But I also have some questions for my female readers out there. Have you ever been cut down by a boy, to the point where your mind really dwelled upon it and you just hurt constantly? Have you ever lost confidence in yourself (or perhaps never really felt like you had it in the first place)? Have you been self-conscious about things, whether they were emotional or physical? I think that the majority of girls would answer yes to these questions. I absolutely urge all of you though; don't ever settle. I can't stress that enough.
Don't. Ever. Settle.
It is so so important to get rid of problems when they occur. If your man is mean or whatever, cast him out. You'll just be infecting your life, and making yourself suffer. It sounds harsh, but I think sometimes you just have to be brutally honest. Maybe subliminally there is a fear of ending up along and that's why people are so quick to settle. And I know that these things don't describe every person out there in the least, and plenty of people have great relationships and with love and caring and support.
Thing is, when I hear the stories like this, I feel like hunting down that guy and kicking the living shit out of him. It simply isn't fair to treat people so poorly.
I hope one day if I have kids that I can instill in them the importance of treating others well. This is especially important when it comes to relationships. If I can do that, maybe it will get passed on to their kids as well. To the females out there that have been there, and suffered, keep in mind how special you are. Keep in mind that there is a man out there who is a perfect match. There is a man who will sweep you off your feet and love you unconditionally. And there is a man out there who will make you happier than you've ever been. So don't be afraid to stand up for yourself and fight for it. You won't regret it.