Over the past semester, and maybe over the past year, my lack of finances has been enlightening, in a humbling way. I've never been at a gas pump and been stricken with panic as I watched the numbers climb. I've never walked through the grocery store, counting in my head and totaling up what each item costs, hoping I had enough to afford the things I needed. I've never scrambled to get money to pay rent, or told friends to wait to cash checks. And yet here I am -- the typical broke college kid. Doing my best to stay on a budget with some pretty extreme maximum limits.
And while all of that is scary, I feel humbled by it all. I gain respect for the people that manage their finances well. I gain respect for students who have started to save regularly for their futures, who actively and vigorously look for jobs and no matter what, make a way to have enough to pay the bills. I have friends that pay their own college tuition, make car payments, live almost entirely on their own.
It's a goal of mine to get there. Self-sufficient. And it will happen one day. And until then, I'll scrape as needed. So while I sit here with a fear creeping in the back of my mind, at least I can still look toward a better tomorrow.