A Financial Burden .

A headline in the local paper caught my eye today, and upon reading the article it talked about how many retirees are now in higher debt than they have ever been in in their life. The reason? Lavish spending? No job to support a normal lifestyle anymore? No. None of those things that might make sense -- rather, they are indebted because of the help necessary to provide their kids with money to pay off debt accumulated from a college education.

People often worry that when they grow old that they might be a burden on their kids -- whether financial, or health and general care; but I can't imagine ever being afraid of debt that serious happening that late in life. I imagine it feels an awful lot like a hole that you simply cannot dig yourself out of -- unless you die.

When I was applying to schools, four or five years ago, there wasn't a second thought in my head of how much debt I would be in, or how I would pay for things. I knew that I would get what scholarships I could, and honor the deal that my parents have always had for the kids; being that they would cover tuition if I covered everything else (that means room and board, gas, car expenses, personal desires, textbooks etc.). I still take out a Federal loan every semester, just to help with those general living expenses. But certainly I am at a supreme advantage over those who have had no financial help from their parents throughout their college years.

Nowadays, perhaps the mindset needs to change. Perhaps employers need to consider the possibility of hiring people that do not have a college degree, which might very well be because they simply couldn't afford the education. Gone are the days when employers would hire college grads and then foot the bill for graduate schooling. But how can it possibly change? A bachelor's degree doesn't mean anything anymore. It is like a rite of passage, an expected achieved just like a high school degree used to be. At first glance that sounds like a good thing -- but upon further inspection one might come to the conclusion that this means that more people are being forced into going to graduate study, something they might very well not be able to afford by any stretch of the imagination, just to get hired at a base level job! This means the base pay, base benefits, all while trying to balance the recently raised level of interest on college loans.

The article mentions that when the decision of whether or not to go to college comes, rarely does one think about how much they're really borrowing and what their monthly payment will be come graduation. Nor do they think about the type of salary they need to make in order to foot those monthly payments all the time. A lot of us depend on the idea that our parents will be able to bail us out if we need it, provide refuge if we can't pay the rent, and offer a free place to eat if we can't pay for groceries. I hate the idea of being that much of a burden to my parents, but is it necessary at this point?

It just goes to show that if you deciding on colleges, pick carefully. Pay careful attention to price, and overall cost, not just tuition. Do some math, do some financial calculation. Nowadays, going to a good school doesn't guarantee a good paying job. Keep in mind how important things like grades, extra experience and unique connections makes. The best of all of those things will keep you a step ahead of the competition.

Is college a worthwhile expense? I still think so. And I hope that come graduation in two years, I'll have a place to live and a comfortable salary at a place where I enjoy my job and the work that I'm doing. There may not be any guarantees, but out of all the jobs out there, there's got to be one for little old me to survive on.

Recognition Series: pt. 2 - Emily F

The first time I met Emily, I wasn't even really officially in college yet. I mean, I guess I had been accepted. But I wasn't particularly attending. In fact, I was at orientation. Clemson is a big enough school where there are orientation sessions during most of the weeks of the summer. The leaders are there to help "orient" you with the campus, help you meet some new friends, and get you ready for the upcoming semester in the imminent fall.

I'll never forget the way we actually met. Emily was my orientation ambassador, as they are called, and there was a moment during the orientation where our group had some free time. We started a game of ultimate, and ended up playing a lot. Emily, in good sport, played despite her admittance that she wasn't very good. Quite the team player, that one. On the walk to the next activity, we got to talking a little bit, mostly about volleyball. By the end of the walk we already had a plan to play together on an intramural team that fall.

On the last day of orientation, as we all met up with our parents to head home, Emily sent the group an email, thanking us for being a great group. She included her phone number, and encouraged us to contact her with any questions or concerns we might have, whether it was during the summer, or after the semester started; whatever. I don't remember exactly how the next bit happened but I do remember that I ended up texting her, and as my family and I drove home (taking a longer-than-normal trip with several stops along the way) we talked endlessly. Every minute brought something new and exciting and we talked everything from religion to tattoos.

By the time I got to Clemson in the fall, Emily was the first person I went and saw after moving in. It was a great feeling to have someone there that I already knew was a great friend, and someone to spend time with. I ended up skipping most of the freshmen activities like Bowman block party, and some other social get-togethers, but I have no regrets about that. I was spending time with a wonderful girl.

Long story short, we ended up dating, and I even planned to go home with her for Fall Break that October (we started school in August, and began dating shortly thereafter). We had some great times, and I wonder sometimes if the reason that things ended was that we saw too much of each other. I think part of this had to do with the fact that I was a freshman, and sort of latched on to the opportunity to see her a lot. During one rough patch, just before Fall Break (at this point we had decided to hold off on the visit), she decided she had had enough and we were no longer dating. I knew things were a little tough at the moment, but definitely hadn't seen it coming. I remember saying the words "well, I had no idea that was coming." I then kissed her on the cheek and walked away, heart pounding.

It may sound silly but I was proud of myself in that moment. I was pretty upset, especially after it felt like we were just getting started. Regardless, Emily had a profound effect on me. She was outgoing and thoughtful, understanding and playful and my parents absolutely adored her. I liked her even more after she was able to so easily charm my parents (not usually an easy feat). We went to church with each other, and alternated between her Episcopalian church (or as she called them, the Episco-pals!) and my Catholic church. It was cool both being on campus and having it be so easy to see each other (just a 15 minute walk across campus). She was, after all, the first college girlfriend!

Today I think Emily is working in some sort of student affairs at another university. I know that things didn't work out, but no matter what I'll always learn something from relationships, and this one was no exception.

Recognition Series: pt. 1 - Kevin K

Going to college is a nerve-racking experience. You're not sure what classes will be like, how hard exams will be, if you'll be able to get the grades you want, if you'll have time for fun-tivities, or if you'll have good roommates. Luckily for me, I was able to choose my freshman year roommate, and I ended up living with a friend from high school. Easy enough, right?

As it turned out, there were a lot more incoming students accepting offers than Clemson had expected, and as a result they had a massive overflow problem. Kids were (I kid you not) even put in repurposed closets as living spaces. Kevin and I ended up in a four person apartment, as opposed to the two person dorm we were expecting. As sweet as it was to have an apartment, with our own bathroom, our own living room and even a kitchen, we knew that this also meant two unknown roommates.

Throughout my whole freshman year, Kevin was a person I could chat with classes about, eat lunch and dinner with all the time, and complain when our roommates didn't clean, or when the oaf who lived nearby named Marcus came by (a loud and boisterous kid whose muscles must have taken over and eliminated his brain). Lunch was always at Schilletter to get what we affectionately called Schillalads and Schlundaes (salads and sundaes). We ate the salads in plowls, you know, those weird dishes that look like half plate half bowl? We decided Clemson House would be a better alternative for dinner rather than Schilletter, since half of campus decided it wanted to eat at 6pm. Thus we'd always make the trek up the hill to C-House, even on the super rainy days.

Though we were in totally different majors (biology v. architecture), held different interests (band v. athletics) and of course had different schedules, we remained close friends through the year, and throughout the entirety of my college career. We shared many laughs, experienced some weird things (like people calling me Red-Shoes, or eating lunch with a random girl neither of us knew, but thought the other did), and made it through the hapless partying of our other two roommates.

I happened to run into Kevin while out for dinner the night of my graduation a few days ago, and even though we drifted apart over the years and created our own friend circles, Kevin was a great first kid to live with and I really appreciated the little support group we had going for each other. Whether it was studying, complaining, meals, or just company, Kevin was always there for me. As far as I know, Kevin's plans are to head to medical school in the near future. But hey, if I end up ever having health problems, I'll know who to call, right?

Family Dinner .

A few years ago the guys and I used to do family dinner on Friday nights. It wasn't family in the sense of our siblings and parents and grandparents showing up, but rather some close friends and great conversation. We'd invite them over to our apartment, and make something pretty simple. In many ways it was less about the food and more about the company. I mean let's be honest someone can only have lasagna so many times before they get sick of it...

Now I realize that that family was even more than that, and really encompassed the entirety of campus, and all its students; in fact, the Clemson Family. I love the quote that President Jim Barker relayed to my Presidential Seminar class, that 'I go to a small school, with thousands of other people.' It's the essence of what Clemson is all about.

Today my family rolled into town, here for graduation, and we had a real family dinner together at my house. I offered to cook since they would be driving all day, and let's be honest; they'll be spending enough money on gas and eating out and all the other things that go hand in hand with a big trip.

Strange as it is to have my family in my home away from home, it was kinda nice. To be able to go out and chat on the dock as the water gently lapped its edges, to have people to sit around the dining table with and say a prayer before our meal, to have folks to laugh and joke with, and show off my college life to.

I wish my brother was here, but he's starting finals tomorrow, and I wish him the best of luck. I have no doubt he'll be able to be there for the graduation of my Master's (but let's not rush things!). Plus as it turns out I'll see him on the way up too! Good deal. Tomorrow I'll be a college grad!

What is Clemson?

Lots of incoming students want you to describe what Clemson is. They want you to tell the ins and the outs, and say what you love most, and what you think could be better. I sent an email to the President of my university the other day, thanking him for what a great job he has done over the past four years (and even far before that), and of course thanking him for his involvement in my Presidential Seminar class, an interdisciplinary course that he created.

He responded with the utmost humility and gratitude, wishing me well in Oregon, and finished up his response with the words "Make us proud." Damn, will that ring in my head for years to come.

What is Clemson? I'll tell you.

Clemson is a family.
Clemson is a small school, that houses thousands of students.
Clemson is the most beautiful place on Earth.
Clemson is the home of Death Valley, and a place where 80,000 people come together to root for a football team.
Clemson is a place where you can walk into a bar not knowing anyone, and come out with fifty close friends.
Clemson is a place where orange runs in the blood of those who inhabit it, and which sneaks its way into the hearts of those who visit.
Clemson is not just a house, but it is a home.
Clemson is a place where the people relish in the expansive fields, beautiful blossoming trees, and the pond-side benches.
Clemson is a great place to eat -- whether it's in the not-so-great dining hall, or someplace deliciously fattening like Chick Fil A.
Clemson is a place to learn, to study, explore relationships, broaden horizons, get in shape, and make life-long friends.
Clemson was my home -- and will always have a place in my heart for the rest of my life. It was the first step of my being truly independent. It educated me more in my field than any other place. It challenged me and encouraged me. It accepted who I was and what I was about despite my being from the North. It pushed me to perform, to do my best, and to strive for excellence. It embraced, forgave me, instilled spirit in me, and finally, allowed me to grow, and succeed, and move on to better things. I appreciate every moment I've had the privilege of spending here. What is Clemson?

Only the perfect place to spend four years of school.

Empty Campus .

Today I sat in one of the student centers for four hours or so doing some work for my boss. I guess I just didn't really feel like sitting at home all day. Despite the large amounts of traffic in the area from all the people moving out and families coming to collect their children, campus was empty. I've been there before when it's in that state -- during things like Spring Break and Thanksgiving break. The interesting thing is that I always know that within a few days the crowds will return.

This time, I won't be there when the crowds return. The masses have left the building, and by the time they get back, I'll be home in New Jersey, preparing myself for a five-day-long trip to Oregon, USA.

The dining halls were closed, the retail dining areas were closed. Everything seemed locked up and locked away, so much so that the group of guys I was going to eat with on campus for lunch couldn't eat there anymore. We decided to hit up Waffle House instead (a worthwhile trip, as always). This morning I even went and visited a few friends who were packing up and hitting the road later today. I can't say enough how weird it is to hug someone and not really be sure when (or, even more scarily, if) you'll see them again. I've never been great at goodbyes, but this one is just different. It's almost as if I'm treating it the same as all the others, when in reality it's completely different.

That empty campus feels so strange. The rain that steadily fell today didn't really help the melancholy mood either. Campus is a beautiful place, but without the people, what's left? The sidewalks become hard stark concrete. The grass becomes a simple footpad, a collection for falling raindrops. The mud smears itself over the slopes, and the shades in all the dorms are drawn tightly shut, as per the request of the Clemson Housing Dept. Without people, the campus is a barren village of buildings and parking lots. Without the people, Clemson is a house, but not a home.

This upcoming week I hope we get a nice day somewhere in there so I can head out with the camera and just take a whole bunch of pictures of campus. I really just want a ton of photos that I can remember the place by. And maybe I'll even end up framing some of them; I think that would be pretty great. And in a week? Well I'll join the volition of those masses -- driving North with Clemson, SC in my rearview mirror.

Finished - For Real .

The exams are finished, and graded. The final projects are turned in. The Lulu studio book is made, ordered, and even on its way, shipped to my professor. The projects are rolled up, the desks are clean, and we're all packing up all the crap that accumulated in our charettes over the past semester. Over this past week I've been trying to see all those who are leaving this weekend, headed for home. The likelihood that I'll see any of these people is very slim -- but I'm really planning on making the effort to keep in touch.

I ate lunch with a group of guys from studio, and after we headed back to studio, it was weird to see one of them call out my name and wave -- for a fleeting moment I felt like I would never see him again. But then I realized that we still have graduation, we'll probably be around cleaning things up in studio, and that we would both certainly be at the reception after graduation.

I then headed straight to the dining hall to meet another group of friends that I actually probably won't see after this year. Upon leaving, we all exchanged hugs -- and I plan to head over to their place tomorrow morning to see them off. But it's still the strangest thing trying to say goodbye to people that you've spent four years cultivating a friendship with. I'm almost inclined to say "Have a great summer, and oh yeah, have a great life too." Gosh that would just be beyond awkward.

I feel so blessed to have so many people tell me that they wish I wasn't moving, wasn't leaving, and that they'll miss me being around and that "we have to stay in touch!" I love that sort of thing. Probably much more than they know. And I sure as hell am going to do my best. I want to collect email addresses, mailing addresses, phone numbers etc. And while the hugs will not really suffice to provide a link to them for the rest of life, the memories I had with these people will certainly last a lifetime, and never fade.

PS : keep an eye out for a post in the near future -- going to be a real long one, and I'm going to go back through each of the years and just talk about people and events that affected me drastically. I'm really looking forward to delving through those memories. Should make for some great posts too. I'm trying to decide whether I want to post it all at once or in pieces... thoughts?

spin class .

Recently I've been taking advantage of some of the free classes that are offered at the gym on campus and I have found a love in spin class. When it comes to spinning, it first sort of piqued my interest because it was related to cycling. It's a great and easy opportunity to do when you don't have the energy to get out there on a ride or if it's raining. And the best part is that you blow an incredibly amount of calories!

I've been trying to go two times a week, on Tuesday and Thursday, and it's been really awesome. Every single time, you leave absolutely drained and literally dripping in sweat. So if you've tried exercising and can never find something that you like, I'd highly recommend spin! Even if you don't like cycling you may still enjoy spin. You can go as hard or as easy as you want to, you can challenge yourself, and the music is always really good to work out with. Happy exercising!

brotherly connections .

Before my brother started college, we would talk to each other pretty rarely. He had high school to deal with, and I had my classes. I had extracurriculars and so did he, but our schedules just didn't seem to mesh up. Despite all of that we always knew that we had each others' backs, would chat if the other needed it, and were supportive through all the challenges that life might bring. Unfortunately, I don't think that we really talked as much as either of us would have wanted to during that time. But it has started to change.

dogs & puppies and stuff .

So the other day, one of my roommates texted me with the information that his boss was looking to give up a 7 month old Husky puppy for free. The dog was up to date with all its shots and vaccinations, and had already been spayed/neutered (to be honest I forget whether the dog was male or female). I have always wanted a dog, and the guys and I had been planning on getting one when we moved into our house -- only problem is the house that we ended up signing the lease for is not pet-friendly. And so we couldn't get anything.

the greek life decision .

My housemate and I were talking about Greek life last night, as Rush Blowout was last night in addition to the First Friday parade and all the sorority floats etc. There are some people that we are friends with involved in greek life, though I don't know as many as my housemate. We do know some incoming freshmen in Central Spirit that just recently were officially inducted into the whole greek life scene.

goals for the semester .

I think it's always important to make a list of goals and things you kinda want to figure out or have done by the end of the semester. And so here's mine, just off the top of my head real quick.

1. Be independent. Try not to ask for money, deal with things on my own, whether that be figuring out trips or financial issues or making sure I get all my requirements done to get myself to grad school next year.

2. Get my list of grad schools ready to go. Figure out what I need to apply, and start putting those things together. I don't want to take a year off from school, so this is very important.

3. Work out and really get fit. Eat well, cut down BFP and really work on both size and definition. I weigh a good 185 or so right now, so maybe bump that up 5 or 10 pounds.

4. Keep up with the biking regimen. Ride every other day for a few hours. It's amazing how much you lose when you don't ride often. Luckily I have a friend who always lets me know about rides that are happening, which really helps keep me on pace.

5. Get all A's. This may be tougher than I think, because senior studio probably won't be easy, nor will some of the classes I'm taking for my minor. But this just means more studying and really buckling down when I need to.

6. Stay on top of things. Work on projects regularly so I'm not stuck doing all nighters last minute. Do good work and take pride in the things that I create for class. I wouldn't want the embarrassment of presenting a project that I'm not satisfied with.

7. Leave time to have some fun. Play some guitar, hang out with friends, lounge out by the lake, play some golf. Everybody needs some me-time.

first day of class .

This week marked the first day of class of my senior year of college. I can't believe that I'm already in my senior year! It truly blows my mind. Looking around in some of the classes for my minor, it's always interesting to see the people who are still sophomores, freshmen, juniors... basically anyone who has not yet lived the years that I have. And every year, it blows my mind more to think about all these people that are here, and all the different life stories they have to tell. And yet, here, in this particular class, our paths cross.

how to pay for college .

So for those of you entering college life (which admittedly, many of my readers are not) it is incredibly daunting to look at the amount of money you'll be spending over the next four years. Ideally you'd want to be thinking about this way before college even begins, so you can plan accordingly (ahh parenthood, it's great until you realize you'll be spending around 200 g's to put a kid through college). But if you're the upcoming student, here are some things that will help you out.

the drive to Clemson .

As per the usual plan, I began my drive down to Clemson around midnight. I slept from 5pm to 11pm or so, and finished up the last few items to pack and toss in my truck (more like carefully play Tetris with my luggage and numerous boxes). I was ready for the long haul. The day started well, with a Wawa hoagie to put in a little cooler and a quart of iced tea lemonade. I was making great time, flying through Pennsylvania on the PA Turnpike. The funny thing about the trip is that you think you're making lots of progress because you pass through a good number of states in a relatively short amount of time (You hit the NJ border, then through PA, then Maryland, West Virginia and into Virginia). Despite the fact that I consider Virginia to be the border of the south, what most don't realize is that once you hit that border, you are in Virginia for FOREVER. You go through the widest part, and so it takes forever and a day to get to North Carolina.

driving woes .

Yes, it has been a week since I posted. For those of you who thought I had forever disappeared, you are sorely mistaken. In fact, I just was packing, getting ready for the trip down to school, and still don't have internet at my house in SC. It's supposed to be ready tomorrow, if AT&T feels like getting their shit together. However, I'm now sitting on campus and I have campus interwebs, so I will post the things that I already had written in preparation for when I did finally have the opportunity! And so without further ado, some serious catch-up:

Prior to any long drive there are things that you will almost always worry about. Being that I am leaving for school in a few days, I took some precautions, like getting my oil changed and fluids topped off, making sure my tires were inflated and rotated. But there are some things that are always sorta in the back of your head when you have a lot of miles to put under your belt.

beginning of the end .

And so it's August. This is the time when everyone starts shitting their pants because they realize that the return of class, homework and projects is just around the corner. And yet, while there are certainly some bittersweet moments, I'm excited for the final year of school. Endings are tough, but always yield new beginnings. The most exciting thing I'm excited for is to really begin polishing my skills as a future architect. Hopefully these future skills will be able to get me a real job for next summer, something that will continue to help me learn architecture!

feeling old .

I went back to my old high school tonight to watch a concert in which my brother was playing. It's strange to see all the high school seniors get up and say where they're going to college this-coming fall. It dawned upon me that while they embark on their new adventure and adapt to their new college surroundings, I will be reminiscing on years past, and focusing on the grand finale to my undergraduate career.

being (un)friendly .

I just read a post by a blogger friend named Jacy entitled How To Make New Friends. It was all about putting yourself out there and really at least giving a friendship a shot by taking the first step. Well, I'm going to talk about this from the other point of view. I've never thought of myself as super outgoing, but I wouldn't exactly say that I'm a recluse of any sort. I'm somewhere in the middle, but probably lean towards more of not exactly seeking out friendships actively.

crunch time .

Ladies and gentlemen, we have reached the end of the semester. The last two weeks, the last week of classes and finals week, are without a doubt the most stressful two weeks of the year for most. And yet prior to the elation regarding the fact that classes are over and summer holiday is in session, we must first haul ass to ensure that we get some what we need to regarding our classes and school work, hence, my absence from blogging.