Every so often I come across a time when I simply don't know what to blog about. It's easy when I'm out and about, traveling around Europe or just around Barcelona. But it's not as easy when it's been raining since I got back from Dublin, and the things that we've done in class have been, well, relatively boring and unexciting (redundancy noted, it was purposeful). At these times I literally type in "What should I blog about" on Google, and the first link always pops up to a guy named Chris Brogan, who has a list of 100 topics he wishes people would blog about, if he were a reader. This is one of those topics.
Blog Topic #43: My Day Job v. My Passion
At this point in life, I don't consider myself to really have a day job. I suppose during the summer, it's working at the club, but honestly all I do during the summer is work, eat, sleep and exercise. Not that there's anything wrong with that, but maybe what I'm trying to say is that I don't believe I've really found my passion yet.
I haven't found that thing that I literally can't get enough of, can't put down, can't stop thinking about even if I tried. Sure, there are things that come close. I've always loved music, and it's more than true to say that I can't do anything without some sort of soundtrack to go along with it. If you see me sitting at my laptop without any sort of music playing, consider yourself lucky because it's an extremely rare occurrence. I like recording and producing music, but when it comes down to it, I don't do it often. I'd even like to do it more, and when the time to do so presents itself I still don't take advantage. Recording is best explained as a huge chore -- and when you're a virtual perfectionist when it comes to pitches, harmonics, and tuning, ohhhh believe me it's a nightmare. You re-run through the same bit of track 80 million times and it still won't bloody sound right.
I guess if you had to put a label on it, architecture would be the thing. However, when you're going to school for things, it always seems like more work and no fun. Though it's a learning process, you feel like you're constantly stomped on, criticized, and lectured on how you should do things for reasons that, after the fact, are obvious and make you feel incredibly stupid for not realizing them in the first place. That's how architecture school is. It's like being repeatedly fucked on a daily basis with no end in sight, and no matter what you try to do to make it a more pleasurable experience it just becomes more painful. Only when you trudge home and turn off the light and dive bomb into bed does it become naught more than an afterthought in your dreams.
That's not to say I don't love it. The work is a challenge and seeing the things you can create are truly incredible given the time frames. But quite honestly, it's a lot, mentally, emotionally, and physically. And at the end of the day, when my head has been sunk in work for hours on end, the last thing I want to do is sit down at the computer and do more reading or studying about architecture. I think the magic for me lies not so much in the theory or study -- but rather in the transition between the drawing board and reality. The thing that will be exciting for me in the field is seeing your designs become a reality. To see something built that you can call your own. That is what I think is so special about it.
Architecture: a passion? I wouldn't say so at the moment. But I think some day, if all goes according to plan, it will become one.