Saturday, November 26, 2011

Barcelona: Day 95 : nice guys finish last .

Is the popular saying true? In the past on this blog I've talked about courtesy and chivalry and all of those things. But does being a douche really make you a desirable person? Well, the way I see it, it goes a little something like this:

Girls who are younger and newer to the dating scene want to have fun. They want to be able to experiment with different guys, and oddly enough, the more douchebags they date, the more they know exactly what they don't want. You see, it's quite hard, I think, to figure out exactly what you want to find in a person. It's hard to pick out exact characteristics and traits, let alone physical characteristics. So perhaps the easier thing to do instead is just get as much experience as you can, and figure out what you don't want instead. Makes sense... I think.

Now, I'm no expert on girls. But I think that they have to go through the whole infatuation process just like guys do. When you're younger, I think that you don't see people as much for personality or valuable traits, but rather for good looks and style. I'm pretty sure everybody has been shallow at one point in their life, right? I've liked plenty of girls just for the way they looked. I never actually dated any of them, but actually got to talking a bit with one and we had nothing in common. I had wanted it for so long (this was years and years ago) and we just didn't really agree on anything, didn't have the same priorities, didn't share any of the same aspirations or goals. There's just no way it would have worked.

Over time, you date some people, and others you just sort of get to know; like when you go out on a few dates but are not officially in a relationship per say. That's sort of how I've figured out what I want and what I look for. And sometimes these little things are only because you like the person for looks; sometimes it just doesn't click.

But to group it all in and say that nice guys always finish last; well, it's simply not true. It's possible that there are people out there that are great people that get stiffed. It's also possible that people end up marrying the wrong person for the wrong reasons. I don't think that there's really any other explanation for such a high divorce rate these days. And as sad as that is, I don't think it's going to stop. Sometimes we get wrapped up in things. And sometimes you just get caught in the moment, and make decisions you didn't really think over.

For the nice guys out there, stay nice. It'll be worth it in the end. And if the right girl never happens to come along, the reason is because you are too good for them. You would put up with too much only to be taken advantage of further, you would pamper them only to be slapped in the face, you would apologize for things that you didn't do. And that would just end up being miserable. Better to be alone than to be miserable with someone else, right? That's my feeling anyways. Nice guys don't finish last. They just are more patient than the rest.

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