Saturday, January 22, 2011

update: life .

So I've been pretty slack on posting here for a few days, and there's been a lot going on. So first of all I apologize on the lateness of the posts, as I do generally post everyday. But I always try to catch up if I miss a day.

And thus, a general "this is what's going on" post is in order.

It's no secret I'm back at school. The transition from doing nothing all day every day to having to all of a sudden jump into projects, in three of my classes at once nonetheless, is pretty insane. It's not that I don't like having things to do and that I think that people shouldn't be productive, it's just difficult to adjust. I honestly don't mind doing work, so long as there is still time for things I want to do.

However, I certainly don't help myself out in that respect with the amount of time I spend on pointless procrastination. Sometimes it's just hard to stay motivated. Then you have to sort of learn to prioritize everything -- and there are those things I would do everyday that I told myself I would make sure I always had time for, like this blog, or the picture a day blog, or a little daily devotional in the book I have. There are things I do each day that I wish I had more time to do. Sure I run, but I'd love to be able to work out too. And I read my daily bible verse emails, but I'd like more time to reflect on them. I was always taught, and constantly hear at church, that God should always be put first. This means that I should be taking careful time to read the devotionals, pray, read my daily bible verses and reflect on them. At one point I was trying to read a few chapters of the bible each night, reading it cover to cover. That kindof drifted away with the sands of time.

But this is where I am torn, caught between a rock and a hard place. There are things that I absolutely have to get done everyday. There are commitments for school, and I'm way behind on my duties for Central Spirit, which I feel terrible about. But homework has no gray area, teachers have due dates. It's like real life, where there are deadlines, things that need to get done, and a specific time frame in which those things need to be done. But for me, the real life seems easier -- in respect to time anyways. But it's hard to say; given that I only really live that life in the summer, not to mention that I don't even have to worry about keeping up with bills or shopping or anything like that. The thing I always liked about work was that you would do your 8hrs of work or whatever, and then you could come home and be done. There was a great separation between work and home, the workload between the 2 did not and do not run into each other like they do while at college. And thus after those 2 ridiculously long sentences I reach my point in question: how will I have time to put God first all the time when I have all of these arising deadlines that are rapidly approaching? How can I possibly get it all done? Needless to say it's something that I need to work on, to savor every minute and get the most out of life that I can.

I sometimes wish that I didn't have to sleep so that I could use every minute to its full potential. Obviously that's not possible. Even better, I wish I could stop time so I could get things done. There are so many things out there to distract me from what I need to do, and the hardest part is eliminating those distractions, and truly focusing on the things I need to do, and what I want to do that will actually help me in life.

I have a general sort of list of things that I know I want to do and work on. A better relationship with God, a focus on music, whether it be playing daily guitar or actually working on Status: Refresh stuff, because I've only touched on the tip of the iceberg with that. I also want to work in meditating a little bit each day. Maybe it would help to make a plan of the day for each day.

Alright, well I'm going to go for a run, but I think I will revisit this subject another time. Maybe even use it as an excuse to take a break from work later today. Because it's something that seriously needs to be confronted in full force; for my own sake and the sake of the rest of my life. But I ask you to pray for me.. so that I may be better in all the things that I do, and so that I may better myself overall.

This post kinda turned into an analysis of time management and usage of priorities, so sorry about that. But I'm satisfied with the way it turned out. To be honest, I usually start with a topic and just let my mind run with it, so if I wander that just means that's the way my mind was wanting to go. Until next time, God bless.

Lyric of the day:
"If the bombs go off, the sun will still be shining, because we've heard it said that every mushroom cloud has a silver lining"

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